Romania gig. AMAZING craic

Now I'm not much one for going out but last night was immense. And it got me over my writers block. No more talking about emotional scarring for me. No sir. Lots to write about and lots of people to mention. So let's get started.
First and foremost is Cathal O'Hagan. Mentioned in a previous post, Cathal's making quite a name for himself here on the blog. Cathal showed me (and maybe created, I'm not sure) the rockabunny. My friend Michael and I were making our way to the dance floor when he stopped dancing and did the "rock on" symbol with his hand. He then started wagging the extended fingers up and down and he said

Look. It's like rock on only a bunny

Greatest. Invention. EVER.

Next is Peter Shannon. Sorry i didn't mention you before Pete seeing as your a huge impact on my life (try not to hear that as sarcastic, it makes it seem mean). Well now you made it simply for your amazing dance moves. After chastising me about not putting him in the blog, he stormed off to the dance floor and busted a move all over the place. I was not aware the male body could move their hips in quite a fashion. You are a testament to human dancing and Diversity can eat their heart out

Christopher Logan is also starting to make himself a name here and if he keeps going he could in fact get that segment he's been looking for. Halfway through the night, we were quite close to the "stage" and we could see the some of the bands smaller instruments. For example there was a tambourine. Chris spent a few minutes raving with a tambourine. Awesome.

The two guys Catherine O'Callaghan was with when i met her at the start of the night. These guys were pretty cool. Immediately started chatting and having the laugh and then we parted to not see each other again....or so i thought. Walking into the toilets at one point i found the two of them with another mate of theirs who was, shall we say, ever so slightly inebriated. Nothing to be ashamed of as that description matches 75-80% of the people there. But he said, in these exact words

Right i can't work this belt. Your going to have to do it for me, man

And one of the guys from the start of the night and I just looked at each other and i said

This could easily be the introduction to a gay porn film

The other non-drunk guy whipped out his phone and began to film whilst saying

Black-mail for the next 6 months

Ah, cracker

Meabh Harper (sorry about possibly butchering the spelling) came up to me and told me i need to smile more. This completely threw me. I mean i think of myself as a cheery smiley dude unless there's something heavy weighing on my mind. i was having a lethal time and had spent the night grinning like an idiot. She also asked a friend of mine to agree with her that my eyes were a weird colour. Good weird she told me. I think I'm flattered, but I'm not sure.

The guy that was with Kirstie Crawford tried to do the elaborate bump fist handshake thing that i completely mucked up. But when i got to the end he told me that i had "the funk"....i think he might have been drinking. He was pretty awesome.

Jamie Higgins lifting me in the middle of the dance floor. For funsies i assume. And then he held me upside down for a bit. This led to me almost starting a dog pile in the middle of the floor.

And this leads me to Myself. I'm not a drinker. Not even vaguely. I believe that all alcoholic drinks would taste better with out the alcohol in them. Fact. I did however partake in beverages loaded with sugar. This was so much fun, i can't even tell you. I don't dance yet i was attempting to busting moves all over the place. It got messy. Never liked dancing before. Granted my "dancing was just flailing in a douchy fashion but still. I spent 10 minutes trying to touch the roof with my head. Using Jamie and Shane Mallon as spring boards. I got pretty close as well. Maybe a foot away.

Things are a hell of a lot funnier when you have a sugar rush. Catherine Corrigan informed me that she went as an oompa loompa for Halloween and showed me a picture. I was very close to urinating with laughter. And because all the shouting had wrecked my throat, my laughter sound insane. Even to me. And that's saying something. It takes a lot to make me realise I'm being weird. The sentence is either weirdly weird or the person I'm talking to isn't used to my sense of humour. I think it's a testament to my childhood that I'm able to laugh that much at a friend dressing up as an Oompa Loompa.

There is only one conclusion. I MUST BE AWESOME!!!!

Moving swiftly on, Another thing I did was say the word fantastic more times than i could count. Surprisingly though it didn't sound any less like a word. Unlike bubblegum. Try saying that thirty times and then see if it still sounds like something you would use in a sentence.

And that concludes what was essentially one massive shout out to Geezus knows how many people.

I've been James Fitzsimons and I think I should come up with an Outro. Post ideas in the comments maybe?

Rambling's of the clinically Deranged

Well this has certainly gotten harder. Friggen blog taking up all of my time. I say all, this is like the first time I've posted in what a week? It's not my fault i swear. I've got lots of work to be doing and it's hard coming up with this crap on a regular basis. But now I'm ....plum? out of ideas as to what to say. Oh look I'm writing something. Wonder if it's any good. Oh well I'm not stopping now. I suppose i should actually pick something that has happened recently to talk about. Or i could ramble. Yeah rambling's fun. I'm not very good at it though. In person i mean. On the computer I'm as good as any hardened rambler. For all you know i took a ten minute break after each sentence. Anyways back to business. What can i talk about? Oh i know!

       Gyms are the creepiest places EVER
I was at the gym earlier today after school. Yes i go to the gym now, so stop all those incredulous expressions on your face and thoughts in your head. Anyways. I walked into the changing room and these two guys were chatting away to each other. Nothing strange about that right? WRONG. They were completely naked. One of them had his leg up on the bench. I wasn't looking at them directly because that's even more creepy. I saw them out of the corner of my eye. And you know that stereotype about gyms being for steroid munchers? Apparently that's not true at all. Everyone there was either fat or really old. I've been told before that I'm like a grumpy old man so i think I'll stick myself in that category thank you very much
So to summarise. Old naked guys in gym changing room. I am scarred for life i swear.

Well that's relatively short for emotional scarring. What else can i talk about? I suppose i could mention people who threatened persuaded me to add them into the blog. So here you are.

First off there's Christopher Logan. Chris if your reading this, which let's face it your probably not, i have yet to see you do anything awesome to earn you your own segment. It would be entitled Logan's Daily Awesomes but so far I've nothing to say about you. Oh and p.s. don't be so proud that you guys beat the townies ONCE out of a possible FOUR times.

Phelim Killough and Cathal O'Hagan (sorry about the spelling) were sitting at the back of the hall during rehearsals for the school play discussing how to tell what a day felt like. Cathal says something along the lines of

How do you even tell what a day feels like (wets his finger and holds it up as if to test for wind) Hmm must be a Thursday. It doesn't work like that. (repeats motion) Hmm I must be sad

The Priest AKA Stephen mcToal who tells me to burn in hell every time he sees me. You made it. Although what you're actually contributing i have no idea. I think you just wanted to be mentioned. So there you go.....go read the bible or something Stevie.

Well i think that's it for now. If you want to be in the blog you need to be Awesome/Funny/ Interesting.



P.S. this is the second time i wrote this stupid post. I hit a button and it took me back through my Internet history. It erased everything. God that's annoying

Milestone!!!!

OK not much of a mile stone but still I've made it.
I have passed 100 page views on my blog. I couldn't have done it without you... Mr/miss Malaysian person. Thank you ever so much. Your contribution means more to me that these people that looked at my blog simply because they knew me and I'd posted it on Facebook. I can see now why they put those annoying adverts on the side of facebook.

*gasp* I could make my own advertisement. Oh wait i have. It's called a profile and it's free.

In all honesty thanks to everybody who gave a crap and who followed the links posted in different places or even if you stumbled across this by accident. It means a lot and if i keep this up this thing could be HUGE. I'm on the road to an actual job in journalism. Fantastic :)

Well, unless i forget or couldn't be bothered I'll keep you posted on view updates.

P.S.....DEFINITELY supposed to be doing an English essay right now. So to all of you in school who wondered how often i write this monumental time gobbler, it's whenever workload doesn't= time given. This blog is what i like to call the dead man's pass time. It's when someone no longer cares if they don't do something or they are in so much trouble they are too lazy to continue the fear and stress. Ergo, Moi. Two languages in the one sentence there. How good am i?

From overwhelming shame, an odd occurence

I recently posted the link to this blog on my facebook page. Thanks to all  of  you who read my posts. I was looking at the stats pages to stroke my ego see how well I was doing page view wise. 29 in a day!! :) This is a record. Granted I've been doing this for like a month tops but still. Anyway on the audience section is shows 40 different people in the UK have visited and 7 in the US. That's fine nothing out of the ordinary. But then I say I had (or have I dunno if you're there) a viewer in Malaysia.

As some of you may or may not know I am easily excited and have the maturity of a 3 year old. But come on. I've a reader on the other side of the world.

As the saying goes:

Gooooo East

Annoying people are annoying

From the title you can probably guess that I do not like annoying people. Maybe that's just me. However they usually put me in a bad mood. For instance, I was at the cinema today and the room was practically empty when we got there. Even when everybody had got there, there were maybe 14 or 15 total. These 2 people came in and decided:

"Hey you know what would be cool?

What's that?

If we sat next to a complete stranger when there are plenty of other empty aisles to choose from.

*gasp* That's brilliant, and I've got an idea as well

What's that?

Lets bring...wait for it....

I'm waiting.

Lets bring our MC DONALD'S WITH US!!

........Sheer unadulterated genius"

I mean seriously. My god. It's a well known feeling that in the cinema, nobody wants to sit next to somebody they don't know. Why must they go and wreck the system. And that wasn't even the worst part. I mean they finished their food pretty quickly so the smell didn't linger. No. The worst part was when the film actually started. One of them quickly revealed that they had never heard tell of the concept of whispering. And she was a questioner. Goddammit I hate questioners. My little sister's one. Remember the one that was part of the gang I talked about a few days ago. The voracious high spirited annoyances. Now I love my sister I really do. But she asks a hell of a lot of questions! And she has an annoying habit of walking in on the tail end of conversations and asked a question that requires me to go through the whole conversation again.

Anyway. The cinema talker people. She wasn't just a talker. When something happened that was kind of funny, the one closest to me (the most annoying is always closest to me. My bloody luck) would wait a few seconds, comment, wait another moment, then laugh.

We went to see Due Date. Not a bad movie but that's not what I'm talking about. There was a part where the main guy got shot in the leg. In her exact words she said:

Did he just get shot in the leg...............hehehehehe.

Now that laugh may read quite sweet and cute. But it wasn't! I can promise you.
I may or may not have mentioned that I can be a bad, cruel mean person. These things are all true. But in person I'm actually very nice and pleasant and very easy to be around. Just ask any of the 3 people that can stand to be around me.

Again I feel I should use the animal comic relief system as this post was just a massive bitching session so here you go:
                

Congratulations Ben and Sinead

Serious short one today.
Just want to offer a quick congrats to Ben and Sinead who as of last night are parents to a beautiful baby girl. I don't think they have chosen a name yet. No news on whether they've asked anybody to be god parents. I'm awaiting my god father request. It should be here any minute. Otherwise I'll just tell people I'm the god father.
Ben has a reputation for being a bit dopey and so it's up to sinead and i speak for everyone when i say we hope yours are the dominant genes

Stereotypes make me laugh when others get in trouble for them

We were sitting in business studies today and we were asked why Ford might advertise at a football match. A guy, we'll call him The Idiot Who Never Stops Talking Even When He Is Just Digging A Huge Cavernous Grave For Himself From Which He Will Never Return. He said that because it was mainly men at football matches and men were usually the breadwinners who buy cars.


If looks could kill Conor The Idiot Who Never Stops Talking Even When He Is Just Digging A Huge Cavernous Grave For Himself From Which He Will Never Return would have spontaneously combusted. And after he said that, he wouldn't stop. It was sheer word vomit. The teacher asked him to stay behind because he had hugely offended her.

Oh Idiot Who Never Stops Talking Even When He Is Just Digging A Huge Cavernous Grave For Himself From Which He Will Never Return, you slay me.


But it got me thinking about other stereotypes. Like all Irish people are drinkers, teenagers are all mischievous trouble-makers and Americans are all fat. I have an English script to write and as i mentioned in an earlier post i am an extreme procrastinator and so to kill time I'm going to shoot down these stereotypes one at a time.

1. The Irish drinker thing. It has recently came to my attention that there is some statistic or other that says Irish people consume more alcohol that any other nation. this doesn't help my case at all. However it just isn't true. We don't all drink. That's sheer insane stupidity. I mean if every Irish person drank, then there would be no designated drivers to take the completely inebriated home. And I'm sure bartenders aren't allowed to be drunk on the job. You gotta think smart people.

2. The teenagers thing? Come on. I'm a teenager my self 2 months away from my 17th birthday. Soon I'll be driving (hopefully) and I'll be going to university (even more hopefullier). I have a hoodie and i wear it...wait for it.......IN PUBLIC :O i know right? scary. Gangly guys and girls wearing comfortable jumpers, which are just the coziest, around other human beings. The nerve. I bet you'd never see a six year old kid giving an old lady a dirty look or building a stereotype because they have grey hair or carry a handbag.
And each teenager has their own crippling issues ranging from

WHY DON'T PEOPLE LIKE ME

To

HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY HAPPY OH I'M SO HAPPY EVERYBODY LOOK AT ME CAUSE I'M ECSTATIC FOR NO DISCERNIBLE REASON. I'M SO HAPPY

I call these people the voracious high spirited annoyances. Oh my how they annoy me. My own sister is one. Always singing singing singing and watching frigging Disney channel which, i won't lie has maybe 2 good/ semi decent shows on it. Phineas and Ferb being the best.
Mmmm pénne. Dinner time= happy time. Any way where was i? Teenagers. Nasty creatures. Glad I'm not one. Ive often been described as a grouchy old man in the body of a strapping teenage boy. Moral of the story. All teenagers are evil and no matter what they say , if they are wearing a hoodie they are almost guaranteed to attack you either verbally or physically. Except for me. Because i am only a teenager because my mind is too mature for my body. And because when i wear a hoodie. I make it look good.

And Finally number 3 the All Americans are fat thing. The only reason this is thought is because McDonald's is widely available in the every state in America. The Americans have brought so many different, not to mention brilliant, things to the world. Now whilst i am sure they exist i am only 16 and while my behaviour may be matured, i cannot think of what they have created for us. Plus i am FAR too lazy to research this kind of thing for a blog. But rest assured that these AMERICAN creations exist
FIRST MAN ON THE MOON. HA that one just came to me. Well yeah Neil Armstrong and Buzz Aldrin were the first men on the moon. American men at that.
In the words of Toby Turner "This is the laziest blog series ever."
That may be true, i don't know I'm too lazy to find out.